Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Soap is not a condiment
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
I just had sex on a roof
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Randomize
