Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
