5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
Randomize