Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
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