I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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