Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
