So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
Randomize
