It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
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