How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
