shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
i out mim tonsoeep
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