i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
How many fucks given?
0.12846
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
