I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
