i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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