Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
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