he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
