Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
