I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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