you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Randomize
