sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
