I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
