I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
