Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
Randomize
