I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Randomize
