My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
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