she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
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