So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize
