I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize