I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Randomize
