He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
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