Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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