Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
