I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
Where are you?
In a non slutty way
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
Randomize
