Have you finally orgasmed yet?
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
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