is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
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