just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Randomize
