May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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