dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
Randomize
