You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Randomize
