like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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