what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
