Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
Randomize
