are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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