dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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