Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
my nose is crying tears of wow.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize
