Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I know her cup size but not her name....
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
