Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
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