ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
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