Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
Randomize