My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize
