She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
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